Beaus, Best Friends, And Bowling
by waterydomestic
Summary: First day of Senior Year Finn reflects on his past and present.


**Title- Beaus, Best Friends, And Bowling**

**Characters- Finn/Rachel**

**Summary- First day of Senior Year Finn reflects on his past and present.**

**Disclaimer- No, I do not own Glee.**

Finn walked down the familiar corridors of McKinley High. It was the first day back from Summer break. The first day of his Senior year. As he turned the corner and his locker came into view he couldn't help but reflect that this was supposed to be _his _year. Finn felt himself smiling as he considered this.

Senior year was to be the year he ruled the school.

Well, him and Quinn.

Was it really only a year and a half ago? Rachel would chide him for thinking in cliches, but it really _did _seem like a lifetime ago. And in many ways it really _was _a lifetime ago.

Because that Finn wasn't this Finn. That Finn did sort of buy into the whole jocks and cheerleaders owning the school stereotype. Not as much as Quinn did for sure, but he did buy into it to some degree. Sure he knew on one level it was bullshit, and perhaps he could even see it was heinous bullshit. But he still bought into it to some degree. Which looking back seemed almost impossible to imagine. Really who ever wanted to run a school? It seemed so......._infantile._

In any case any dreams of running the school had long since disappeared. Finn liked to think that he grew up a little, wised up and started dreaming better dreams. Less petty ones. And that was all true. But maybe he had to throw those hopes away because after Sophomore year ruling the school was never going to be an option again. So perhaps his perspective changed because his opportunities changed which wasn't anywhere near as noble as his opportunities changing because his perspective changed.

Still, whatever the process, the result was still one he welcomed. Finn was able to walk these hallways happy with himself.

Finally.

Well, he still wasn't as smart as maybe he wished he was. Still not really cool either. Still never quite sure he was saying the right thing. Still knew that words which sounded perfect in his head never seemed to come out quite right. But still he was happy.

Because he was finally confident.

Not 'what a great guy I am' confident. But confident that he could cope. Could cope with high school, with college, with classes, with football, with glee, with expectation, with lack of expectation, with anything. He winced feeling like he may have jinxed himself a little bit. Just because he felt he could cope with life's wrinkles didn't mean he necessarily wanted some massive tragedy to befall him as if to say 'here you go pal, cope with that!'.

No, sophomore Finn could never have imagined that this was what lay in store for senior Finn. Hopefully that Finn would be happy to witness the person he was today. He'd love to be able to go back in time to sophomore Finn, not to change anything, he knew you didn't mess with the space time continuum. But just to tell his younger self that, hey a lot of crap is gonna go down but you're gonna be alright kid. Seriously, it won't feel like it at the time, but you're gonna be just fine.

With a lopsided grin Finn gave his locker a comforting little pat. Reminiscing about his and Quinn's aspirations to run the school was actually the first time he'd thought about Quinn for a while. He frowned, actually it was the first time he'd thought about Quinn all summer. He hadn't seen much of her the summer before junior year when she'd been been busy having her baby. But he'd thought about her that whole summer practically. But here he was, one summer later, and she wasn't even a blip on his radar. Shaking his head he hoped she'd had a good one.

"Hi Finn!"

Startled out of his reverie Finn turned to see Rachel Berry two lockers down, regarding him with her trademark, so wide it almost hurt to look at if it wasn't so cute, grin. Finn happily returned her smile.

Rachel always made Finn happy.

Which seemed a pretty straightforward thing, but when Finn had realized it, that summer he was thinking about Quinn seemingly one hour out of every three, it was like an act of revelation. Like some blinding vision or something. Rachel would call it a moment of clarity._ Seeing Rachel always made him happy_. Now, Finn was no rocket scientist, but logically being happy was a good thing, and seeing Rachel made him happy, therefore.......see more of Rachel. Not see more like that!! Just see her more often, not more of her. Although..... feeling his face start to burn he tuned back into Rachel's voice.

"Finn. Are you okay?? You don't look well." Rachel asked obviously concerned for his health. The way his thoughts were bouncing around this morning she should be more concerned for his mental health. He sought to reassure her.

"Yeah yeah I'm fine. Sorry. So where were we. Oh! Yes! Hi Rachel how are you? Don't tell me I beat you in this morning." He teased her. Rachel's early starts to the school day being a long running joke between her and Finn. "Senior year is no time to rest on your laurels." He chided, shaking his head in disapproval.

In reply Rachel arched one perfect eyebrow.

"In actual fact Mr Hudson I've been in since seven. I wanted to make sure everything was present and correct in choir room and that sign up sheets for glee were prominently displayed."

"Of course you did." Finn laughed amused. It was such a Rachel Berry thing to do.

"Finn! For all we know there may be some actual talent ready to emerge in this years Freshmen class. Yes we have shone in our time here, and I fully expect our final year to bring us at least a top three place at Nationals. But its incumbent upon us to leave a full and lasting legacy here. The numbers of glee club are up, but while there may be enough kids to continue with glee after we have graduated, we could always do with more. Hopefully we can find some new hopeful young would be stars out there who we could take under our wings and graciously mentor along the sometimes difficult and thankless road to musical stardom."

By 'we' he knew Rachel meant 'her' but Finn was too enthralled by the way her eyes were shining, and her arms were making wide expansive gestures, to point this out. Really, he reflected, she was tiny. Like, really tiny. But she still somehow always filled the room. Even when she wasn't being particularly loud she filled the room. Or maybe it was just that no matter what else was going on in the room somehow your gaze always came back to her. Well, his did anyway. Finn guessed that this was what was called star power. Still, just because she was a star didn't mean he couldn't have some fun bursting her bubble a little.

"Just be careful when you take this ingenue under your wing that she doesn't end up All About Eveing you." He warned her.

He and Rachel had watched the old movie at the beginning of summer. In it a Broadway star takes a young fan under her wing helping her out in the industry. Pretty soon the girl steals her role and tries to steal her boyfriend. Finn's only joking, but Rachel's eyes go comically wide as he sees the scenario go racing through her mind. He' pretty sure he sees her mouth the words 'no little harlot is going to Anne Baxter me!' as her eyes narrowed in thought. Then she shot her head up to eye Finn suspiciously, and he's not quick enough to hide the smile that shows that he's totally messing with her.

"Not! Funny!" She exclaimed, as she turned abruptly and stomped her way down the hall, away from him and towards the choir room.

"Aw Rach!" Finn called out, enjoying the way her hips rapidly moved from side to side as she managed an impressive pace given how short her legs actually were. Not to mention the sight of her butt. "I'm just looking out for you." He added, tilting his head to the side to better capture the view afforded him. Unfortunately, instead of continuing down the hall as he expected, Rachel spun around no doubt to further berate him, taking Finn by surprise, his head still obviously tilted caught in mid leer.

"Oh I see you looking out Mister!" Rachel declared hands on hips. "Unbelievable!" And with that she turned around and continued her march crying out "Stop looking you pervert!" as she went.

Finn laughed and watched until she rounded the corner. He loved to rile her up, and as much as she might deny it, he knew she loved him riling her up just as much. It looked like choir room was out for a while so Finn headed over to the auditorium. He had gotten into the habit Junior year of going there early in the mornings about an hour before anyone else would arrive. Well anyone else not named Rachel Berry. He went there not to sing or anything, but to do some homework or get a little ahead in his reading. Which circumstance probably would have sent sophomore Finn into shock. Finn loved the ambiance of the auditorium and some of the best moments of his life had happened there. He met Rachel there. The first performance of 'Don't Stop Believing' happened there. His life pretty much started there.

So now he liked to do his schoolwork there, and his thinking there, and his reading there. He still wasn't the smartest but he had set himself goals that dark summer, and for the goals to be met his grades would have to improve. Not just his grades. Him. He would have to improve. Be smarter. Being smarter meant being able to make better decisions and the smarter you were the more options you had. Being smarter was one step along a path to freedom.

So no, Finn hadn't magically transformed into an 'A' student. But he wasn't a 'D' one anymore either. He was a mostly 'B's with the odd 'C' thrown in(Spanish still kicked his ass) and he was even pulling semi regular 'A's in math. Which still boggled his mind a little. But Finn liked the rules of math. If you followed certain ordered steps you could get the right answer. And if you didn't, the teacher could point out exactly where you went wrong. It wasn't like you had to give an answer and then debate it or argue your position. Well maybe if you were at some super advanced Good Will Hunting math level then you had to argue. But normal regular maths was just correct or incorrect. No debate. Finn wasn't at his best at debate.

But even with those subjects he didn't necessarily 'get' he found that studying like crazy helped notch his grades up. Maybe that only meant C+ to B- but every little helped, and helped him feel better about himself. Rachel was really great about studying with him for those times outside the auditorium. They weren't often going over the same material, but she was really serious about her grades.

Hell, the girl had this drive to excel at just about everything. Which Finn would have thought was sort of impossible but apparently Rachel was determined to be the exception. Thankfully she sucked at sports and video games so Finn was almost certain she wasn't in reality some super advanced alien from another galaxy, sent to earth to gather intelligence on its people, and perhaps pave the way for colonization. Well, it _was_ possible. For the longest time Finn had just assumed he was stupid, and while he wasn't ever going to be winning any academic scholarships any time soon, at least he didn't go around with the weight of his stupidity on his shoulders any longer. Literally class by class grade by grade he felt lighter and more confident.

At times like this he reflected that Rachel really had saved him. Or he had saved himself. They hadn't gotten together until the middle of Junior Year. Finn had his happiness revelation the summer before but had decided to go the friends route. Firstly, because the whole Quinn debacle had convinced him that romance was doomed. It would either end in death(his dad) abandonment(Puck's dad) or complete and utter betrayal (Quinn and you know who). Okay looking back a ridiculous overreaction, but at the time the feelings were real.

So his thought process that summer was Rachel made him happy-spend more time with Rachel-If they dated it would all go to crap and he won't see much of her anymore-therefore just be really really really good friends with her then he can see her all the time through high school, college and beyond. This seemed to Finn pretty much foolproof, and seeing as he was often times a fool, that had much to recommend it.

Of course it had the added bonus of Rachel only being amenable to the friends, just friends thing, seeing as she already had a boyfriend. Oh yeah, did he forget to mention that? Towards the end of Junior Year she had hooked up with a guy from another school. Called Drake. Which really, what kind of a name was that? What were his parents thinking?

So yeah, Rachel was with Drake and the guy was kinda.......well..... great really. He was good looking, or at least Kurt said so. Well what Kurt actually said was,

"What the hell do all these hot looking boys see in _her_??! Do they not see how she dresses? Do they not hear her as she talks talks talks talks about herself. It can't be looks! It can't be personality! She must be some kind of succubus, because really, you, Puck and now Drake, who incidentally makes you two look like the Ugly Sisters, it's just not fair!"

Finn had to admit the guy was good looking. And funny. And smart. Finn was pretty sure he had to be hiding something, like that guy Bluebeard or whatever. Though he doubted that Drake had actually killed his previous wives, or even been married for that matter considering he was only seventeen. But no, Drake wasn't perfect and him and Rachel would have the odd spat, but nothing too serious. And Finn had to grudgingly admit that the guy treated Rachel right. Like she deserved to be treated. He didn't put her on a pedestal, he didn't out and out worship her, but he never, not once, as far as Finn could tell, treated her as less than what she was. He treated her like an equal and he loved her and respected her and listened to her and supported her.

During the course of that summer and the start of Junior year Finn spent a lot of time with Rachel. And with Rachel and Drake. And after a while with just Drake too. Turns out he was annoyingly good at Call of Duty to go along with his other virtues. Seriously the guy was perfect, and if it wasn't for the fact that Finn just couldn't ever imagine wanting to kiss a guy, he just might have fallen in love with Drake himself a little.

Finn loved him a little anyway because of the changes this relationships brought in Rachel as well. She was still Rachel, and Finn didn't think that any person, or government for that matter, had the power to change that, but she started to grow in confidence. Not that confidence had ever been her problem. But this was a different kind of confidence. It was a social confidence. Finn liked to think he played a part in this too, but he thought it was probably mostly Drake. Rachel began to realize that she could be liked for being her. That she didn't have to drastically alter herself. She didn't have to be less ambitious or quieter or just less. Sure maybe she could be a little more considerate of others but that didn't mean holding back from going after what she wanted. She began to relax into herself a little bit. Trust herself a little more. The lightness that improving his grades and freeing himself from popularity had brought to Finn, came to Rachel through Drake liking her for her and showing her as much, and from Finn acknowledging that she was his best friend and letting her know that she was really really freaking good at it.

So it had come as a complete surprise when two days after Valentines during Junior Year he had been round Rachel's house trying to perfect a ballad for glee club, they'd been at it for about two hours when during a break Rachel announced that her and Drake had broken up. It was hands down the most shocked Finn had ever been, and yes that even included _that _time. He remembers sitting on her bedroom floor with what must have been an utterly ridiculous look of bafflement on his face. One, because they had broken up. Two, because she hadn't immediately called him to tell him. Three, that she had waited till two hours into rehearsal to spill the news. Four, that she had seemed perfectly okay during the whole time he had been there. After a while he managed to find his voice.

"What? When? Why? Did something happen? Of course something happened. I mean what happened?" He asked still trying to get his head around the shocking news.

Rachel seemed hesitant and slightly anxious. She was nervously playing with the label of her water bottle, using her thumb to slowly inch back the label millimeter by millimeter.

"We just decided, _I _decided, that things weren't working out. I still care for him but I think we work better as friends. Besides I've got a lot of things coming up. This is Junior year Finn it's really a pivotal year for me and glee and school so I don't really have the time needed to devote to a relationship in order to make it work." She said, not sounding all that convincing to Finn's ears. She wasn't telling him the whole truth. She was definitely holding back something.

"He didn't do something did he Rachel?" Finn wasn't sure what Drake could have done. He was pretty certain Drake wouldn't cheat on Rachel but then again Finn didn't have the best track record of detecting that. He wasn't exactly Sherlock Holmes.

"No Finn, he didn't do something." She sighed. "You know Drake Finn, he's a really good guy."

Finn nodded. Drake was a really good guy but still Finn wasn't buying Rachel's story for some reason. However he could see his continuing to interrogate her wouldn't do any good and he decided to just try to be a good friend and offer her support instead.

"Are you okay?" He asked, scooting across the floor a little so that he was within touching distance just in case Rachel got upset and needed a hug, or got mad and needed to hit him or something.

His question brought what looked like a genuine smile to her face. Not a full fledged Rachel Berry special, but a smile nonetheless.

"I'm okay I promise." She said, nudging his knee with her right foot, still smiling.

Finn wracked his brain to trying to think of what was appropriate in such situations.

"Um.. do you want to talk about it? Or not talk about it? Or pretend we haven't talked about it at all? Or do you need me to get ice cream? Or have you already got ice cream? Should we watch a sad film together? Or maybe a comedy to cheer you up?" Finn faltered his way through a myriad of suggestions as Rachel looked on increasingly amused at each lame suggestion. By the end she was giggling uncontrollably struggling to get enough breath to get her words out.

"Oh Finn!! Stop you're making my sides hurt. Ha hahaha. Oh Oh . Your face! You look so confused!"

Finn felt like he should be offended that his genuine attempt to be sensitive and caring had met with such derision, but seeing Rachel momentarily carefree and happy was a price his ego was more than willing to pay.

"That's it. Laugh it up Rach." He moaned, pretending to be offended. "Now I'm the one in need of some comfort ice cream." Finn got up and mock flounced out of the room, Rachel's increased laughter echoing behind him. As he peered into the freezer looking for ice cream, he was a trifle hungry after all, he couldn't help grinning at his success in cheering Rachel up. In the back of his mind however he was aware that there was no way it should have been that easy to amuse her. She'd been happy with Drake, he was sure of it. He'd been good for her. There was more to this than met the eye and if Rachel wouldn't provide answers then perhaps Drake would.

Which was how he found himself the next day standing outside Drake's front door looking for the real story. Taking a deep breath Finn proceeded to knock on the door. As luck would have it Drake himself answered, looking momentarily puzzled for a second before smiling broadly.

"Finn!" He greeted. "This is a pleasant surprise. Come on in. What brings you to my neighborhood?"

Well Drake certainly didn't seem heartbroken. Or if he was he was doing a really good job of hiding it. Finn had prepared himself for an angry Drake, or perhaps a defensive Drake, even a morose Drake. He hadn't however prepared himself for a normal Drake. If Rachel had broken up with Finn then Finn wouldn't have been answering the door to anyone for at least a month. Minimum. And when he eventually did you could bet he certainly wouldn't be smiling. All this had caught Finn a little off guard.

"Um.....Hi Drake...I just...err...Rachel told me what...um..happened...Just wanted to see if you were okay...y'know..and everything.." Finn managed to get out.

Drake looked amused rather than annoyed, and even a bit touched.

"That's really good of you Finn." He said kindly before giving a small shrug and saying. "I guess things just didn't work out. I mean I think Rachel's a great girl."

"She is!" Finn interrupted, to Drake's visible amusement. "I mean, sorry, go on, you were saying." A red faced Finn apologized.

Chuckling to himself Drake continued. "As I was saying. Rachel's a great girl and we've become really close friends. I love spending time with her and singing with her. She's great and one of the more interesting people I've ever met. I'll always be here for her and we'll still hang out. In fact we're going to an art exhibit next Sunday."

"Yeah she mentioned that the other week." Finn couldn't help saying, a bit confused by the whole situation. "So if you're still gonna go out with each other and stuff and you obviously still really like her and I've never heard her say a bad word about you. I mean **never.** I don't get why you're all of a sudden broken up." Finn admitted.

"Look Finn. I love Rachel, really I do, and I think she loves me too but neither of us loves the other like we want to. It's not the kind of love we're looking for. Sure we're attracted to each other, well at least I'm attracted to her, I assume she's attracted to me."

"Oh she is." Finn interjected, before realizing what he had said and blushing profusely much to Drake's amusement.

"She is is she?" Drake raised both his eyebrows in question.

"I mean you're a good looking guy so I figure she must be..I mean." This was not going at all like Finn expected. Why was he babbling about Drake's movie star looks? Movie star looks! What was wrong with him? Finn was spending way too much time with Rachel, and the time he wasn't with Rachel he was often with Kurt which was no better. They were messing with his head. He needed more guy friends. His mind flashed briefly to Puck. Or not.

Drake decided to take pity on Finn and save him from his embarrassment.

"So yes, Rachel and I were, are, attracted to each other but there were no sparks. That feeling where you can't take your eyes of each other. Where you find yourself doing crazy stuff like imagining what the other persons thinking pretty much every minute of the day, where music sounds better and food tastes better and the light shines brighter and all the stuff written by poets actually makes sense and you can believe in it when you never thought you would. That feeling is out there somewhere. That kinda love. And yeah we're only in High School so the chances of finding it for real are pretty remote, but the possibility of it should be there 'cos if even the possibility, even if its mistaken, isn't there than you're just wasting your time. That's what Rachel wants. It's what I want. I never really felt that way about Rachel but I hope it's out there."

"And Rachel feels the same way?" Finn asked, bewildered by the impassioned words from Drake..

Drake shook his head. " Not really. You see Finn, Rachel _knows_ that kind of love is out there. She's _certain_."

"How could she know?" Finn wanted to know.

"She knows." Drake answered seriously, before smiling and patting Finn on the shoulder.

"I appreciate you coming and checking on me Finn. I hope we can still be friends, you'll still be my Call of Duty buddy."

"Of course. No doubt. So....me and you are friends and you and Rachel are friends."

"Yep. I still care about Rachel, we haven't fallen out or anything, no hurt feelings on either side. We don't regret starting it. And we don't regret ending it."

"So you'll be friends like me and Rachel are friends?" Finn asked.

A clearly amused Drake smiled.

"Maybe not exactly like you and Rachel are friends. But friends nonetheless." He chuckled.

"Now what do you say about some c.o.d action."

"Sure." Finn agreed.

True to his word, and Rachel's word, things progressed almost like normal. Over the next month Rachel and Drake still hung out quite often, mostly with Finn in tow, although there were the odd bookstore readings and theater classes the former couple attended together. As far as Finn could tell there didn't seem to be any underlying tension between the pair, and you better believe he'd been looking. He still didn't understand it, hell they were perfect together weren't they?

The third week in March Drake confided in Finn that he'd met someone. She was on Drake's schools volleyball team and was friends with his sister who was also on the team. It seemed they really hit it off and had been on a couple of dates that had gone well. Drake wanted to know if Finn and Rachel wanted to go bowling with the new couple since Amanda really liked it and Rachel had picked up the habit too over the summer with Finn.

Now Finn was no expert on dating but he was pretty sure going on a date with your new girlfriend alongside your ex girlfriend was inadvisable. He tried to convey this to Drake as gently as possible.

"Have you lost your mind dude?!"

Drake just laughed and assured Finn that everything would be fine, and that no, he hadn't lost his mind. Apparently Rachel and Amanda had already met, which was certainly news to Finn, and had gotten along famously. In fact it was Amanda who had suggested including Finn and Rachel in her and Drake's outing. Finn found the whole thing baffling but figured he might as well tag along if only to provide support for Rachel in case she found witnessing Drake's new relationship first hand hard to take. Or maybe to support Drake if Amanda proved to find the whole ex girlfriend thing impossible to deal with. Or heck even Amanda in case Rachel and Drake decided they did love each other like that after all and passionately made out in the middle of a lane. As far as Finn was concerned the whole situation was screwy and any of the above scenarios were eminently possible.

Finn had worried himself into an uptight sweaty mess by the time the foursome met at the bowling alley. It appeared he was the only one however because Amanda and Rachel quickly had their heads together discussing some book they had both read. Meanwhile Drake threw sarcastic comments their way about 'chick lit' to the girls obvious, in Amanda's case, less obvious in Rachel's, feigned annoyance. Finn just looked back and forth between the three resisting the almost overpowering urge to jump to his feet and shout "What is wrong with you people? This is not how people behave!" Eventually though he began to relax and actually enjoy himself and there was an undeniable something in the looks that would pass between Amanda and Drake. Unfortunately by the time he had managed to relax Amanda and Rachel had an unassailable lead much to their delight. Oh well, a triumphant Rachel was a happy Rachel, Finn had learned.

After the girls victory had been confirmed Rachel and Amanda visited the restroom together leaving Finn and Drake to lick their wounds. Finn was mildly grumbling about the 'bizarro' situation throwing his game off, much to the other boys amusement.

"What were you expecting to happen tonight Finn?" Drake wondered."Some kind of cat fight?" He laughed.

Well, Finn hadn't ruled that out to be honest, but no he expected at least a little..well weirdness. The only weirdness or awkwardness of the evening had come from Finn himself. That the possibility of some sort of fight had indeed crossed Finn's mind was obvious to Drake from Finn's embarrassed reaction. Drake laughed aloud.

"Oh Finn man. Don't ever change."

"Hey!" Finn protested. "It wasn't beyond the realm of possibility that things could have gone bad.....So you and Rachel really are friends then?" He asked in wonder.

"Yeah we are." Drake answered easily. "Just friends. Which leads me to wonder why you haven't made a move on my _friend_ Rachel yet."

Finn thought he was suffering from some kind of hysterical deafness because he couldn't have heard what he just thought he did.

"Wha....why...I don't know what you're talking about." He managed to stutter.

Drake's smile slipped away and he started shaking his head in disapproval.

"Finn man I really like you. You're a good guy. But you're gonna have to make your move soon or you're going to lose your chance and that would be a real shame. The fact is as far as I can see you and Rachel are made for each other. It's blatantly obvious to everyone else except the two of you. Well I think that maybe Rachel realizes it but she's chased you enough as it is. This time it's going to be up to you to man up and tell her how you feel."

Finn just felt himself staring stupidly at Drake. Him and Rachel. Together. Made for each other.

"How I feel." He said repeating Drake's last words.

"Yeah how you feel." Drake looked passed Finn beyond his right shoulder." The girls are coming back now. But seriously think really hard about Rachel and how you feel about her, what you feel for her. What she means to you. Really examine those feelings and let me know what you come up with. Okay buddy." He finished kindly.

So Finn spent the next three days doing exactly what Drake had suggested. He thought about Rachel. And himself. And Rachel and himself together. What he came up with was that she was his best friend. The person he trusted the most (aside from his mom). The person he respected the most. The person he was the most able to be himself around. She was the place where he was the best version of himself. A better version of himself then he had ever been before. She had been a huge reason in him becoming that version.

It wasn't all one way either. He was pretty sure that Rachel, while awesome anyway, was also perhaps more relaxed with Finn. Perhaps she had more dimensions when she was with Finn. Sure she could still be her smart accomplished ambitious focused driven self. But she could also find her playful, goofy, lazy mischievous side when she was with him. She was the person whose laugh he wanted to hear the most. Who he most wanted to be happy. Who he felt the most protective over. Whose triumphs pleased him the most. Whose disappointments hurt him the most. She was easily the most important person in his life and he didn't want to imagine his life without her. Sure they would take different paths after graduation but Finn was determined that they would still be in each others lives, still supporting each other, perhaps more than ever.

His equation still held. Rachel made Finn happy(and vice versa he was pretty sure) so spend as much time as possible with Rachel. It had worked. Finn _was _happy. Happier than he'd ever been.

So he hadn't even questioned whether or not he loved her for a long time. But was it romantic love? Well he certainly was attracted to her. All the time. In a way he hadn't ever been attracted to anyone else before, even Quinn. Hell, even Megan Fox. Rachel was hotter than any girl like... ever.

Finn was always a little puzzled as to why the whole male student body didn't see that she was so clearly the hottest girl in the entire school. It wasn't like a 'She's All That' situation where she hid her good looks behind glasses and loose fitting clothing(not that that would work in Finn's opinion). She wore those ridiculously, tortuously, short skirts. Finn was always both impressed and admittedly disappointed that she would go through the entire school day always remembering to bend from the knees and not the waist whenever she had to bend down. Not once did he ever catch a glimpse of anything he shouldn't have. And you better believe he'd tried. Which he guessed was a good thing because he hated to think of all the other guys at school getting a view. He liked to think he was a good guy, and a respectful guy, but there were times when he was just _a _guy, and he would sometimes almost swear he would sacrifice his friendship with Rachel in exchange for her just once bending from the waist.

Great! He was meant to be thinking about what Rachel meant to him and his imagination was going all Skinemax. But images of Rachel Berry were pretty much burned into his memory. She was pretty much all he thought about. All the time. Even in his well.....private time. He wasn't sure it was entirely ethical to be thinking about her when he was doing....that. He was pretty sure she wouldn't exactly be flattered if she knew, more likely grossed out. At first it disturbed him too. He thought so highly of her he wasn't sure if he was diminishing her by picturing her in all manner of scenarios. He'd tried to rely on porn instead but it didn't really work. Instead Rachel's face and Rachel's body would replace the images on the screen. Crap! She'd even ruined porn for him! Porn!! She'd achieved the impossible. Again!

So to recap. She was his best friend. He cared for her. He trusted her. He had the best time with her. He missed her when they weren't together. He found her insanely hot. He loved her. He was in love with her!

He was screwed.

The next day a disheveled, bleary eyed through lack of sleep, Finn found himself once again in front of Drake's door waiting for his knock to be answered. Drake barely had the door open before Finn exclaimed.

"I'm screwed! And it's all your fault." He marched right on in passed Drake and glared at the other boy pointing an accusing finger at him.

"Ah." Drake merely replied. "I thought your stubbornness would hold out for another couple of days. Glad to see you've seen the light ahead of schedule." He said offhandedly.

"Well maybe that's 'cos I've been up the last three days thinking about my feelings. Like _someone _told me to." Finn answered angrily.

"So. Now you know. This is a good thing Finn." Drake said happily.

"A good thing? No, it is not a good thing. Do you know why it's not a good thing?" An uncharacteristically sarcastic Finn demanded.

Drake arched his eyebrow. "Pray tell."

"It's not a good thing because it's ruined everything." Finn insisted.

"Come on." Drake scoffed. "How has it ruined _anything_?"

"Look." A clearly exasperated Finn explained. "No-one knows this but over the summer I had an episode." A look of alarm crossed Drake's face before Finn corrected himself. "No, not an episode, what's the word...an _epiphany_. I had an epiphany."

Drake's alarm turned to skepticism.

"_You_ had an epiphany?" He said, before realizing just how doubtful he had sounded and quickly hurrying to make sure he hadn't offended Finn. "I mean, you had an epiphany." He said in an even tone.

Finn rolled his eyes clearly noting Drake's first reaction but not really blaming the boy. Finn himself had after all been pretty surprised by it.

"Yes._ I_ had an epiphany. Wait that means kinda like a revelation right?" He inquired unsure.

"Close enough" Drake grinned.

"Right then, I had this epiphany. I realized that Rachel makes me happy so I decided to spend time with Rachel." Finn announced proudly as if he had just explained the mysteries of the universe.

This announcement was received by a distinctly underwhelmed looking Drake.

"That was your epiphany. That Rachel made you happy so you would spend time with her." Off Finn's nod of confirmation he continued. "Well I'm not sure that's much of a revelation Finn."

Finn frowned. Drake wasn't getting it.

"No man. It changed everything for me. When I look back to then and compare it to now. I was in a really bad place then. Everything was slipping away. I was losing myself or maybe I had just given up on finding myself. The self I wanted to be. But that one decision to spend time with Rachel. To let her be there for me. To make sure I was there for her. It changed everything. I'm happy, and maybe that doesn't sound like a lot, but believe me there was a period when I didn't think I could ever be truly happy again." Finn said sadly, lowering his eyes and placing his hands on top of his head.

"So you're happy. Still not seeing how everything's now ruined." Drake said, patiently trying to understand why Finn looked so miserable.

A weary Finn tried to explain.

"So I had this revelation and sure I knew I could easily fall in love with Rachel. I mean come on it's Rachel!" He stated, as if this was indeed explanation. Finn clearly thought it was entirely self evident why anyone would fall for Rachel. Seeing as Drake had indeed fallen for Rachel he accepted this explanation.

"Anyway," Finn continued, " I knew what a relationship meant. What romance meant. It meant things ending badly, really badly. I mean I didn't think Rachel,would ever do me like Quinn did. That's not her. But still I'm not exactly the greatest example of how to behave when in a relationship myself. I mean I kinda sorta had something going on with Rachel while I was with Quinn. I mean not really but really if you know what I mean. I mean not anything sleazy but still not cool, yknow. Plus I was still screwed up over the summer so jumping into something with Rachel wasn't really an option. Not if I didn't want to screw things up." Finn explained.

"That was then. This is now. I get why you weren't ready to start something then but that was nine months ago. Since then Quinn's had the baby, given away the baby. She's moved on, you've moved on. You're not still into Quinn are you?" Drake narrowed his eyes at the thought.

"God no!" Finn replied. "No, she's like not even...just no. It seems like she's okay I think and that's good but no she's not on my mind at all, hasn't been for ages."

"So why not go for things with Rachel then?"

"It's not like I think we'll crash and burn or anything but things happen and college is approaching fast and I want to make sure we stay friends. She's the most important person in the world to me. I'd hate to mess that up."

"I think you should have more faith in yourself. And Rachel. But let's just say it didn't work out, that you did in fact mess things up. Which you won't. You'd still be friends. You and Rachel have something between you. You forget that I get to hear how you talk about her and I get to hear how she talks about you. That's not going away anytime soon. Believe me." Drake argued.

"Really?" Finn queried.

"Yeah really. Anyway if by some chance things didn't work out you could go back to being friends, it worked for me and Rachel for instance."

"Yeah." Finn said sounding more convinced. "You really think she'll give me a chance?" He asked hopefully.

"You'll never know until you try." Drake said cheerfully. "But yeah I'd say you've got a pretty good shot. Bear in mind that Rachel's a sucker for romance. So make it good. Do a little wooing." He advised.

Finn nodded trying to convince himself. "Wooing. Yeah I can do that. Romance. I can do this. Thanks man." A suddenly excited rejuvenated Finn said.

Drake smiled encouragingly. "That's okay buddy. Go get her!"

It took a week for Finn to put his plan into action. Well plan might be overstating things a tad. The plan consisted of him buying flowers, check. Memorizing a couple of stanzas of some poet called Byron that Drake assured him Rachel was into, check. Putting on a suit because Rachel had let slip that she really dug the formal look, check. And letting Rachel know just how much she meant to him, how she was his entire world, only in much much better words than those.

Everything was in place. Rachel was expecting him to come over to do some homework and maybe watch a dvd. Her dads were out. The coast was clear. Everything was coming together. He was ready. Except. Now that he really looked at them the flowers in his sweaty hand looked decidedly limp. The harder he looked the more they wilted as if his gaze had some kind of destructive ability. So he decided to ditch the flowers. For all he knew Rachel was allergic anyway.

Instead he decided to go over his speech in his mind. Unfortunately the Byron and his heartfelt speech were beginning to get mixed up together in his head. For every line of his own he'd rehearsed a line of Byron's would follow it. He couldn't understand it himself in his own head so god only knew how Rachel could be expected to. Furthermore the suit was itchy as hell and Finn caught himself scratching places that it really didn't look acceptable to scratch. He would have to abort his mission he thought dejectedly.

So it was that a somber crestfallen Finn presented himself on Rachel's doorstep. He managed to plaster a semblance of a smile on his face and prepared for a normal, hopefully enjoyable, evening at the Berry household. A smiling Rachel answered the door. Finn's smile obviously wasn't convincing enough for her however because Rachel's smile quickly transformed into a confused frown.

"Finn, what's the matter?" She asked with concern. "Why are you wearing a suit?"

Finn stumbled to find an answer. His mind was completely blank. So he decided to do the first thing that popped into his head.

He kissed her.

He leaned down and planted a kiss slap bang on the mouth of a stunned bewildered Rachel. After a moment she responded, returning the kiss enthusiastically for a few seconds before realization as to what was happening set in and she pushed him away.

"What?!" She said loudly. "Why would you do that?" She asked.

Finn's mind was still not providing him with any answers.

"You can't just do that to me Finn! You can't just...... kiss me!!" An upset Rachel declared.

That managed to kick Finn's brain into gear.

"I wanted to. I came here tonight because I want to be with you Rachel. Me and you. That's why I'm wearing this itchy suit. It's part of the wooing process."

"The wooing process?!!" An incredulous Rachel repeated. "You put on a suit. An ill fitting _itchy_ suit, and without so much as a hello practically assaulted me! That's what you call wooing? Well let me tell you Finn Hudson you have a lot to learn about wooing!" Rachel finished angrily, before slamming the front door shut in Finn's face.

Crap! That was like total wipe out. A whole weeks planning down the drain. Why the hell couldn't Finn ever perform under pressure? It was the same with football. All the practice, all the preparation went out of the window and Finn reverted to acting on his instincts. Which, okay, sometimes worked on the football field, but obviously didn't work with Rachel. Stupid!

Finn was still standing on Rachel's doorstep frantically trying to come up with his next move, when the door reopened and a furious Rachel Berry glared out at him.

"Well Finn. What do you have to say for yourself?" She demanded.

"I do so know about the wooing process. I've been practicing all week!" Finn protested.

If anything this only served to make Rachel even madder.

"Oh really. Just who have you been practicing kissing with all week?! Santana I bet!! She'll practice anything with anyone! Boy or girl! Man or beast!!"

Whoa whoa whoa danger. He was giving Rachel totally the wrong impression.

"No no no Rach. I haven't been kissing anyone else. I couldn't do that. I wouldn't do that. You're the only one I want to be kissing. I promise." He glanced at Rachel and was relieved to see that she was looking a little less furious. "I meant I've been practicing what I was going to say all week. And how I was going to say it. But then the flowers just like died or something in between my house and yours. And how is that even possible? So I had to ditch them. And I learned this poem for you by Byron and I swear I had it word perfect but then it started to get mixed up with the list of reasons why I loved you and I got confused and it all went wrong. If you don't believe me I can show you the book at home. Oh Oh wait a minute. I recorded it into my phone so that I could hear what it sounded like back and learn it better. Now where's my phone?" Finn pleaded patting his pockets trying to find his allusive cell phone.

Rachel had gone completely silent. She was just staring at Finn with an unreadable expression on her face. Finn eventually located his phone and fumbled with the buttons to replay his recital. He pushed play only to be surprised by his voice not reciting poetry but giving an entirely different kind of recitation.

"Reasons why I'm in love Rachel Berry. Number one her smile. No number one she's my best friend. Number two her smi..." Finn quickly shut off the recording. "Wait a sec." He blushed."That's not the right bit. Hang on." He skipped forward a little and again pressed play.

"Number Twelve the teeny tiny skirts she we..Crap!" Finn exclaimed, shutting off the phone once more. "I swear the poetry is on here somewhere Rach. Crappy phone." He mumbled, chancing a glance down at Rachel praying that she wouldn't once again slam the door on him, this time for good.

Rachel however had a broad grin on her face and a twinkle in her eyes.

"Teeny tiny skirts huh?" She laughed. "So how many did you come up with?" She asked softly.

Finn was still flustered by the happenings of the last few minutes and wasn't sure what Rachel meant.

"Huh?"

Rachel patiently explained.

"Reasons why you're _in love_ with me. What number did you get up to?" She smiled. "Purely out of curiosity you understand."

"43." Finn admitted beginning to think that this might not turn out be a complete disaster after all.

"43." Rachel said. "43's a good number." She allowed, stepping forward and gently taking Finn's hand in her own. "Maybe you do know a little something about wooing after all." Rachel pulled Finn into the house. "Just so you know I'm gonna want to hear the whole of that recording at some point." She told him.

Finn was momentarily panicked recalling that some of the reasons that he had listed for loving her wouldn't perhaps paint him in the most chivalrous of lights. Teeny tiny skirts were the least of it. Still, looking at the determined glint in Rachel's eyes, he knew he really didn't have any choice.

The rest of the night had been spent with them revealing their true feelings for each other. Finn was stunned to hear that he was the reason that Rachel had ended things with Drake. That she had known that she didn't feel for Drake even half of what she felt for Finn. Finn had asked if Drake had realized that and Rachel had said that she hadn't wanted to lie to Drake so she had told him the truth. Apparently he was really great about it. That part of it really didn't surprise Finn that much however. The guy was a good friend. So what had started as a disaster had ended in heartfelt declarations and kissing. Which in Finn's opinion was how he intended to spend every night in the foreseeable future.

Seven months later he and Rachel were still going strong. Better than ever. They loved each other. They trusted each other. They liked to think they brought out the best in each other. It was the start of Senior year and Finn couldn't have wished for anything more. Well he had once wished for something different. But no way was that anything more. There _wasn't_ anything more than being totally completely hopelessly in love with a completely awesome girl. Her voice brought him out of his thoughts as she entered the auditorium.

"Finn! Finn! I've been calling you for ages. You really are in another world today aren't you?" She said. "What's going on in that mind of yours?" She asked.

Finn smiled widely and pulled her down into his lap to kiss her.

"Just thinking about us and how I couldn't have dreamed of having such a great girl by my side for Senior year. Everything's perfect. You're perfect." He insisted.

"Hmm. Are you sure you weren't thinking about number twelve?" She said smirking.

Finn just laughed. "Well," He said, sliding his hand higher on her thigh, "It is one of your teeniest tiniest."

Rachel chuckled slapping his hand away. "It's not that short!" She huffed.

"Aw Rach." Finn moaned. "You know I heartily approve of the length of your skirts. Anyway," he mused, "it's high time I updated that list."

"Thought of more than 43 reasons why you love me huh?" Rachel said hopefully.

"Way way more." Finn agreed pulling her closer to him as their lips collided together. "Way way more."

The End


End file.
